Double Digits

AND.... #10 is finished!  Jim soldiered through another surgery today.  They removed the spot on his right pointer finger and froze five other spots on his right hand.  Unfortunately, the wound did require a skin graft to close.  The donor skin was taken from his inner bicep area of his right arm.  

Jim's hands pre-surgery, 12/22/15.
The spot on his pointer finger was addressed today.

After his surgery, we went to our traditional lunch out, courtesy of our dear friends Erin, Claire, and Terry.  Thank you so much for the gift card.  We relaxed at Downriver Grill while Jim was still in the *sweet spot* before the injections wore off.  

Jim's post surgery beverage, a local stout.

  

DRG gorgonzola fries with bacon.  YUM.

Thank you to our other dear friends, Jon and Bonnie, for watching our boys overnight.  We are so grateful for the time to conquer our Christmas to-do list last night.  Of course, it was a huge present to have the guys happy and occupied while Jim and I were away, as well.  Thank you!!

Dang It!

Well... that celebration was fun while it lasted!  Jim found out today that the biopsy on his right pointer finger is positive.  This spot has been frozen before and hasn't gone away.  So, his chances of skipping out on surgery this time are small.  He is scheduled for Tuesday, December 22nd.  Merry Christmas!!  

12/14/15
Jim's right (left side of the picture) 
pointer finger is the current positive spot.

On his left hand, the surgery spot on his middle
 knuckle and the graft by his pinky are healing.

***Merry Christmas to Jim****

Ready for some good news?  We have been waiting for it!  First, Jim found out his last biopsy was NOT cancer!!!  YES!!! That is so awesome!  Then, today's scheduled surgery turned into slightly aggressive freezing and a deep biopsy.  The spot that was scheduled for surgery was on the middle knuckle of Jim's right hand.  It hadn't grown since his biopsy and didn't feel deep.  The doctor felt confident freezing and monitoring it was  a safe option.  There were three other spots the doctor froze, as well.  In addition, there was a spot on Jim's right pointer finger that has been frozen before and is still troubling.  They biopsied that and we will wait and see.  Perhaps we can get lucky again!  We really feel like Jim dodged a bullet both with the last biopsy and the downgrading of today's procedure.  It was about time Jim had an easy one.

Jim's hands before freezing.  12/7/15
Last biopsy is on his right pointer.
Last surgery is on his left middle knuckle.
Skin graft is healing between pinky and ring fingers of left hand.

Celebratory beverage!!

Jim's right hand.  12/7/15
Frozen spots - base of ring finger,
middle knuckle, base of thumb.
Old biopsy (closer to palm) and new biopsy are bandaged.

Jim's left hand.  12/7/15
Frozen spot on middle finger.
Last surgery spot on middle knuckle.
Graft healing between pinky and ring fingers.

Blown Away

Wow, I don’t even know where to start with this update, but here it goes!  On Veterans Day, our veteran got some disappointing news.  Last surgery, the doctor took a spot off of Jim's left middle knuckle.  I said it was a surgery in the previous blog post, but it really was more of a deep biopsy.  When the staff analyzed it in the office that day, it appeared to have clean margins, but barely.  The doctor sent it to the lab, just to be sure, which turned out to be a smart decision.  As Jim's luck would have it, the margins were not clean and another surgery in that location was imminent.  Dang it.  Surgery was scheduled for Wednesday, November 18th, fifteen days after his previous procedure.  

The night before Jim's surgery, Spokane was hit with a massive windstorm.  Like most of our community, we lost power and also lost part of a tree that night.  We woke up in the dark on Wednesday, wondering what to do.  Jim tried to call the doctor's office and was unable to connect.  Since school was canceled, we packed up the kids and headed out.  The dermatologist did not have phone service or internet, but they did have power and were able to do the surgery.  It took two layers to get clean margins on Jim's knuckle, leaving a deep spot.  At first, the doctor was ready to do a graft and then decided it wasn't necessary.  That was a huge present!  Jim's stitches are tight and he has to really baby that hand, but avoiding another graft is a blessing.  The graft he had a few weeks ago is healing well, thank goodness.  Also, there was a spot on the pointer finger of his right hand that required a fairly aggressive biopsy.  We are waiting for results now.

Jim's left hand.  11/22/15.  Healing graft on pinky finger from 11/3/15.  Latest surgery on middle knuckle.

Jim's left hand.  11/22/15.  Healing graft on pinky finger from 11/3/15.  Latest surgery on middle knuckle.

After surgery, the boys and I took Jim out to our standard, post surgery lunch.  Due to the fact that most of the city was without power, the restaurants were overflowing with hungry guests.  We did get a table downtown and maybe overate a little in preparation for a simple meal at our powerless home that night.  Then, we returned to our cold house and built a fire.  

Post surgery beverage!

After the last surgery a few weeks ago, Jim had an uncomfortable, but minor reaction to his pain medication.  He woke up several times feeling quite itchy.  The doctor changed his medication, which was definitely better, but still left him feeling uncomfortable.  Due to his reactions, the doctor prescribed another new med.  Once we had Jim tucked in by the fire, we set off to get his prescription.  The first drug store we tried was completely dark.  So, we headed up the road to the next store, only to find the same scenario.  We decided to go a little further and see what we could find.  It took us a long time to go a few blocks as the stop lights were all out and traffic was heavy.  After quite a while in the car, traveling a very short distance, I thought it was best to check in on Jim.  Unfortunately, we were unable to get the medication that first night.  Jim spent a rather cold night at home with the medication that made him only kind of itchy.  UGH.  The following day, he headed to work and I packed up some things.  It didn't seem like 52 degrees was a great temperature for any of us, but we were all hoping for as much comfort as possible for Jim.  Luckily, my parents had power and were ready to take us in for a few days.  Recovery was much easier with a warm bed, a real meal, and finally medication that helped with pain and didn't cause any discomfort.

We are home now, feeling a little guilty having power while so many are still in the dark, but so glad to be back.  Jim's next surgery is two weeks away on December 7th.  The plan for that day is to address the spots on Jim's right hand.  Hopefully his left hand will be functional enough by then.  I'll keep you posted!

Although this surgery was quite an adventure, we are so grateful to so many loved ones.  We are extremely thankful to our neighbor who spent Wednesday limbing the downed pieces of our spruce and hauling branches away to the dump.  That was the nicest surprise after surgery!  Thank you to the neighbors who have been raking our yard.  I know it has happened at least three times in the past weeks, but probably more.  Thank you to the neighbor with the gas hot water tank who made it possible for us to sneak off to surgery clean.  I was dreading showing up with my greasy, crazy hair.  OH, and thank you for the hot coffee!  I know the line at Starbucks was insane as no one had power that morning.  Thank you to my folks for taking us in, feeding us, letting us drink the good wine, and so much more.  This has been a tough road, but much easier with the love and caring of friends and family.  We are humbled and grateful.

Crazy #8

Today marked Jim's 8th skin cancer surgery.  As I scrolled through Facebook this morning, I read so many thankful posts from friends and family.  I reflected on that and briefly thought I wasn't thankful for a darned thing.  I even considered posting something snarky and sarcastic about being thankful for cancer.  Perhaps I was indulging in a bit of a pity party, but luckily I realized it could be so much worse.  We really do have so many reasons to give thanks.  Truthfully, I am extremely thankful for Jim's medical team.  His doctor is absolutely amazing.  He always listens to our concerns, takes the time to discuss options, and every single time makes decisions that best address Jim's medical needs while balancing his personal concerns.  Today, and so many other days, I am very thankful for our wonderful doctor and his skilled and compassionate staff.  Of course, we are both so thankful for our circle of support.  Our friends, family, neighbors and coworkers have been amazing.  Thank you to all of you for your kindness and caring.  

In today's procedure, they removed a spot of cancer that was nestled between Jim's pinky and ring fingers on his left hand.  This is a spot that doesn't naturally have a lot of excess tissue, but also was the site of his first surgery and was a little thick with scar tissue.  Those factors made us pretty nervous he would require a skin graft.  As we feared, he did need one to close the site.  UGH!  The donor skin was taken from Jim's upper left arm.  Additionally, they addressed a spot on the middle knuckle of Jim's left hand.  The doctor's suspicions of cancer were confirmed, but luckily it was not too deep.   A third spot on the outside of his palm was removed and will be biopsied.  The doc thought that was pretty small and that if it is positive he is very hopeful the margins will be clear, requiring no further surgery.  

Afterwards, Jim was ready for grub!  We enjoyed the magic time before the local anesthesia wore off with lunch out.  It always seems like a tiny bit of a reward to spend some time together and relax once the procedure is complete.

Jim celebrated surviving another procedure with a Stella...
or maybe two.

Of course, T3 was on the menu for me. 

So... time to relax with good pain meds.  Jim's next surgery will be on his right hand on December 7th.  Five weeks to heal before we go back for more!  

More Chapters

The other day, Quentin was telling us about a school writing task called a “small moment.”  As he was discussing his topic options he said, “I really wanted to write about Dad’s skin cancer stuff, but this is supposed to be a ‘small moment’ and that story is more of a chapter book.”  Well… that’s the damn truth!  I love his honest insight and believe Q hit the nail on the head with his analogy.  So, in the spirit of chapters… it is time to write the next few chapters in Jim’s book.

Last week, Jim had a planned follow up with his dermatologist.  At that appointment the doctor shared with us that he has been watching the research for squamous cell carcinoma (SCC), specifically with Jim in mind.  Unfortunately, there has been no new research for SCC, so our treatment options remain the same.  BUT, there is new research in the area of basal cell carcinoma, which leaves us hopeful that maybe SCC will be next.   After examining his hands, the doctor froze every questionable spot that was small enough to treat through freezing.  In all, Jim had 33 spots frozen on his hands, 2 on his arm, and 1 on his face.  Truthfully, it was horrible to witness.  I was blown away with how tough and resilient Jim was that day and has been throughout this entire journey.  I would have had tears flowing like a river, but Jim just took deep breaths and carried on as the liquid nitrogen can repeatedly assaulted him.  Next, the doctor zeroed in on two spots that required biopsies.  At this point, I got my buns out of there!  I figured the last thing Jim needed was me succumbing to the nausea that was creeping up.  Jim endured the two biopsies, one on each hand.  His strength, tenacity, humor, and determination are absolutely incredible.  

And then…. We waited.  I would say that is the worst part, but my eyes have been opened to more of the trials of Jim’s journey and can only imagine the pain of biopsies and the 7 surgeries he has had thus far.  Of course, healing from this many frozen spots was the pits, too.  Jim’s poor hands looked like they had lost a battle, with many spots blistering, swollen and painful.  Now, he is mostly scabby with a few blisters.

This week, Jim got the call from his doctor’s office that begins, “I’m so sorry.”  Well, both spots are positive for squamous cell carcinoma.  Since the spots are not on the same hand, it will require two separate surgeries.  Jim will head in for one hand on October 27^th and will return a second time (or technically a NINTH time) on December 7^th. 

Jim's right hand.  Current SCC spot is under the bandaid.
Dark spots are from the freezing.
October 2, 2015

Jim's left hand.
Current SCC spot is between the pinky and ring fingers,
in scar tissue from first surgery.
Dark spots are from freezing.
October 2, 2015

I have contemplated what else to say about our lives lately and figured it might be good to share and answer some frequently asked questions.  So….. here we go:

Do they know what is causing this?

No.  The doctors do NOT know why this keeps happening to Jim.  The popular theories involve his Crohn's medication (which he is no longer on, but took for a LONG time), radiation exposure in the military, and a job stint doing game studies near Hanford.  Any one of these could be the culprit or all combined could contribute to his situation.  Of course, being of Irish decent, fair skinned, blue eyed, and previously a little lax about sunscreen hasn’t helped.

Can’t they do anything else?

Our options are surgery and topical chemotherapy.  Traditional chemotherapy would not be effective in treating this kind of cancer.  Additionally, radiation is an option for some, but our doc feels it could make Jim's case worse.

What if you did nothing?

Well... that's not an option we are entertaining.  If we did nothing, the cancer could spread deeper and then eventual surgery would be more invasive.  Our doctors, whom we trust completely, have been very clear that complacency would be the worst option.  

Could the cancer be anywhere else?

At this point, my two biggest concerns would be anything affiliated with his Crohn's disease or lymphoma.  Jim is up to date on all of his Crohn's tests and he is in really, really great shape.  Concerns regarding lymphoma came up early because of the connection with the medication he had been taking.  He has NO symptoms of lymphoma.

So, how are you doing?

We are really, truly doing ok.  It stinks, it is so discouraging and frustrating, but we are ok.  We know he will live through this and maybe they really are building his clone bit by bit in the lab.  Of course the world needs two Jim's!  We did get to relax and enjoy Jim's time of being cancer free.  We handle each day with humor, a drink or 4, some profanity, a whole lot of love, and just keep swimming.

Finally....

Waiting for Jim's biopsy results always brings on a little anxiety, at least on my part.  If we had bet on the outcome, my money would have been on one positive and one negative.  Jim's birthday came and went on Wednesday and still no news.... did I mention my anxiety?  Of course, being the loving spouse I am, that prompted me to ask, "What if they saw your birthdate in your file and decided to wait a day to give you the results?  Why bum you out on your birthday?"  He laughed and told me he would let me know as soon as he heard something.  Well, as luck would have it, his best birthday present came a day late.  BOTH spots were negative!!!  Hooray!!!  What a huge relief.  It truly was his turn for some good news.  

Jim is doing well.  Healing and finding humor in his recovery.  I have decided his stitches 'stache is definitely more Charlie Chaplin and not Hitler-esque at all.  What a goofball.  The stitches will come out next week, hopefully giving him a much needed break.

Jim's stitches. 7/29/15

What? No Whiskey???

Today has been a pretty typical summer day - a walk with the dog, kids at science camp, a hair cut, and oh yeah, Jim had surgery....again. That's starting to be a little too routine for us!  And, even though he made a special request, the doc still did not have whiskey for him!!  What is up with that?  I'm pretty sure it should be part of the frequent flyer program.  They could have punch cards like the coffee stands - at the lucky 7th surgery, free whiskey.  Sounds good, right?  Unfortunately, the only shots he received were painful and involved a needle.  UGH.

As for the surgery details, things went well.  The entire spot was removed in one layer, getting all the cancer in that location, and a skin graft was not needed.  YES!!!  In the following picture, the surgical spot is marked with the circle on Jim's pointer finger.  The circle at the base of his thumb and the opposite side of his palm were frozen.  The last two circles, by his middle finger and up on his wrist, were biopsied.  We should have the results of those biopsies next week.  

Jim's left hand.  7/22/15

In addition to the spots on his hand, the doctor froze a few spots on Jim's face and is watching a concerning spot on his other hand.  Jim will return in a couple of weeks to monitor his progress and have the stitches removed.

Jim is now home and resting, headed for a nap after his exciting morning.  Thanks for all the positive thoughts and well wishes.  Jim is doing well.  He's in the good spot - full belly, tired, and glad it is over.  Hopefully, he will do well this evening and overnight.  That's typically when things get a little bumpier for him, but we are getting to be pros at keeping him comfy and staying on type of the ice and meds.  

Jim - post surgery.  7/22/15

  

Some Good News

Today, Jim was scheduled for surgery on the pointer finger of his left hand - the most recent positive biopsy.  BUT, over the past week and a half, Jim's middle knuckle on his other hand had swelled significantly with a dark spot in the middle.  This is the spot that was operated on in March.  

Cyst on knuckle of right hand middle finger.
 6/24/15

Cyst on knuckle of right hand middle finger.
6/24/15

Jim showed this spot to the dermatologist who felt like that had to be addressed before the spot on his left hand.  He did suggest possibly operating on both hands, but the daily limitations of having no functional hands would be tricky.  So, surgery was only on this swollen spot on his right hand.  It turns out the spot was not cancerous, but rather a cyst caused by the previous surgery.  The cyst was easily removed and closing the location did not require a skin graft.  Whew!!

We are so relieved that this spot was not cancerous and that it did not require a skin graft.  All good!  Unfortunately, surgery on the cancerous spot on his left hand had to be rescheduled.  We will go in again on July 22nd for surgery #7.  

One Year Anniversary

So, it has been exactly one year since Jim's first surgery.  In lieu of any type of celebration, Jim received a call letting him know that his most recent biopsy is positive for squamous cell carcinoma.  He will be facing his sixth surgery on June 24th.  Damn it!! A week ago, he went in for a follow up appointment post chemo wrap.  The doctor froze a couple of precancerous spots on his face and some concerning spots on his right hand.  His left hand, the one that had just finished the chemo, had a spot that looked questionable on Jim's pointer finger.  The doc biopsied that and told Jim he was almost certain it was squamous cell carcinoma.  Of course, he was right.  UGH!!

Jim's newest SCC spot - pointer finger on left hand. 6/9/15

Spots frozen from Jim's face.  June 2015

Each time we get a positive biopsy, it gets a little harder to take.  I wish we could find a positive spin, but it is cancer, it sucks, and the surgeries are absolutely miserable.  This one, being on his finger, is another good candidate for a skin graft, too.  Those are truly hideous.  Hopefully, it won't come to that, but we are definitely realistic.  Three out of Jim's five surgeries have required skin grafts. 

We received the first of many positive biopsy results a year ago in April.  Once we had the original two summer surgeries scheduled, I remember thinking how this would all be over when school started in the fall.  Here we are ending the school year that started that fall and facing more cancer news.  It is so exhausting and frustrating.  And... it's cancer.  We can't sit back and wait, we can't ignore it, we have researched alternative treatments and are not willing to risk Jim's health, so... here we go.  

We did talk to the dermatologist about studies researching this type of cancer and maybe finding something to try with Jim.  He said the skin cancer that is being researched aggressively is melanoma, because the mortality rate is higher than squamous cell.  At this point, the medical options are surgery and topical chemotherapy, both of which Jim has done and is sadly prepared to do again as needed.  We do believe in our doctor's expertise and know that Jim is receiving the best care.  This is a very strange, atypical case.  We feel all we can do at this point is take each day as it comes and keep going.  

(Warning.... I am getting on my soapbox.  Proceed with caution.)

The other day, I saw something that made me completely nauseous.  It was a study discussing how sun exposure is actually safe!  It stated that people who spend time in the sun without sunscreen have healthier skin and lower skin cancer rates than people who are cautious by limiting sun exposure and/or wearing sunscreen.  This makes me physically ill as it is encouraging dangerous behavior.  Two things to keep in mind before jumping on this bandwagon are:

1. The study has not been replicated.

2. It was conducted in southern Sweden which is around the 60 degree north latitude mark.  (Thanks to the ski resort, we all know we are hovering a little shy of 49 degrees north latitude in Spokane)

All the current research listed on the cancer sites is the exact opposite.  I am including two links to reputable skin cancer sites if you're interested in risk factors, the stats, and some preventative tips.   

American Cancer Society Info for Skin Cancer

Skin Cancer Foundation Facts

Please, please, please take precautions in the sun this summer and for the rest of your life.  We have shared some of the mildly graphic pictures of Jim's journey, but actually have much more detailed images if you need a little persuasion to be smart in the sun.  Skin cancer sucks.  It sucks a whole lot.  As the one sitting on the sideline, I can tell you it is extremely horrifying to watch.  I would do absolutely anything to take this away from Jim and prevent it for the rest of us.  Trust me when I tell you it isn't worth it.  And, if you need sunscreen, I will buy it for you.... totally not joking.

Quentin, Vader, Chemo, Stats, and Tips

I am totally prepared to bore you with more cancer details, BUT first, I wanted to shamelessly brag about one of our sweet sons.  Quentin made his goal of donating his hair to Locks of Love!  It all began in kindergarten when he met a boy at the park with long hair.  Being a fairly inquisitive kid, Q asked him why he had long hair.  The boy told him he was growing it for Locks of Love and explained what that meant.  By bedtime that night, Quentin had firmly decided that he was going to grow his hair to donate, too.  Jim and I were both a little skeptical about that decision, but we supported his caring heart 100%.  So, over the next two years, we learned all about kid conditioners, the best combs for his thick mane, how to deep breathe when our child was sure we were pulling his hair out in our grooming attempts, and when to shake our heads and let our guy conquer the day with a bit of a tangled mess.  For his part, Q dealt with my endless nagging to brush his hair, Jim's careful combing after a shower, being mistaken for a girl by strangers, and unfortunately, some mean teasing from kids at school.  Quentin has learned some powerful lessons along the way about name calling and how to be confident in his own skin.... or hair as the case may be.  About a week ago, his gorgeous curls were finally long enough to donate.  With just over 11 inches on his head, he willingly had 10 inches cut off to send to Locks of Love.  We are extremely proud parents!  Way to go Q!!!!

Q before his Locks of Love donation. 4/28/15

Q after his donation!  So handsome!!! 4/28/15

Now for the star of our show.... Jim.  He is back to the Vader force choke hand again!!

Our last glimpse of the pre-chemo hand.
Not sure who is more menacing!

This week, Jim started week 4 of topical chemo.  Each Sunday, we take the multiple gloves and dressing off his left hand so he can give it a good washing.  Then, we reapply the cream and carefully wrap his hand and cover it with gloves.  It isn't a hard process to do, but it isn't really fun for either of us.  I am including some visuals of this *awesome* endeavor.

After the chemo cream is applied, each finger and then Jim's hand is wrapped in thick, drippy gauze.  The "drippy" component is zinc based and helps with healing.

The gauze is covered with a cotton glove to keep everything together.  That is followed by a latex glove to help keep the cream from dripping and leaking out.

The final step is a black glove to try to blend in a little bit.  This glove gets changed out and washed often.... germ factor!

Throughout the course of this treatment, Jim has been experiencing burning and itching, like he did on the right hand last fall.  The spot we were concerned about (on the side of his middle finger) has been particularly painful and irritated.  Yesterday, Jim visited Dr. Sears to check in on the chemo process.  He has two more weeks of chemo treatment to go before he can shed the gloves.  The doc told him that the red spots in the picture are all precancerous lesions.  He feels that the bigger spot on his middle finger is squamous cell carcinoma.  Jim also had a spot on his right hand frozen.  Might as well get our money's worth, right?  Sadly, there was no tequila on this Cinco de Mayo appointment.  LAME.  

Jim's left hand 5/5/15.  Week 4 of chemo.
The spot on his middle finger is most likely cancer.

I also decided to revisit the stats.  Sometimes, I get kind of curious as to how far we have come.  On one hand, no pun intended, it is nice to celebrate my husband's strength and tenacity through this trip, and on the other, it is kind of discouraging to see just how much stuff he has endured.  In any case, here it is for the curious minds that want to know:

16 total biopsies

5 surgeries that removed 9 total spots of cancer

3 skin grafts

13+ frozen concerning spots 

4 weeks of chemo on the right hand

working on 6 weeks of chemo on the left hand

10 or so bottles of medicinal fireball drained at our home

25+ cases of wine consumed by the loving spouse

And... the profanity count is just too high to keep track.

Finally, May is National Skin Cancer Awareness Month.  I suppose everything has a month nowadays!  The link at the bottom has a few tips about sun safety that can help reduce your skin cancer risk.  Also, Friday, May 22nd, is "National Don't Fry Day."  It is celebrated on the day before Memorial Day Weekend to help remind us to enjoy our holiday safely in the sun.  I'm not sure how to personally celebrate this day, but am considering a tub of fries and an umbrella... or since it is "don't" fry day, maybe I better make that a tub of jo-jos and an umbrella... and wine, definitely wine.
  Don't Fry Day Tips 

One Glove...

Since his surgery, Jim's hand has been healing well.  The skin grafts are healthy and doing their job.  For a bit, it felt like one of the grafts was attaching to something and pulling when Jim bent his finger.  Over time, and with gentle use, he was able to work through that and it feels more like normal now.  Whew!  So far, a successful recovery.

Jim's right hand.  Skin grafts on middle finger and base of thumb.  4/7/15

We met with his dermatologist yesterday to figure out what would be the next step.  Since his last visit, Jim had a new spot develop on the middle finger of his left hand, surgery last month was on his right.  When I asked Jim what he thought it was, he said he didn't know yet.  With some insistence and badgering, (my forte lately), Jim did confess that he was relatively certain this was cancer.  In the past, Jim's gut feelings on these spots has been about 90% accurate.  So... that didn't sound awesome.  We spoke with the doc about this new spot.  He shared our concern and contemplated ways to address it.  When we were in last time, he wanted to start topical chemo cream on this hand after the other had healed from surgery.  With that in mind, he decided to go ahead with chemo cream starting next week.  Jim will be able to apply the cream at home, we can wrap it together, and then change it once a week.  He will go in on May 5th to have the progress evaluated.  The current estimate is the chemo process will take about 6 weeks. Well, Cinco de Mayo will be awesome.... they should at least have tequila for a frequent flier like Jim, right???  

Jim's left hand - spot on middle finger between knuckle and hand. 4/7/15

The doctor also peeked at the spot he was not able to address last time on his right hand.  Since it hasn't grown since then, he was content to watch it and give Jim a break from the surgery schedule.  We both are so relieved to dodge that bullet.

SO... on we go.  Jim is definitely not looking forward to the chemo cream and the glove situation again.  He said that along with being uncomfortable, it gets so old explaining to people why he has one glove on.  His right hand is still sensitive, although looking really good, so he is gentle with that hand, too.  Poor guy!  Our kids are both getting very used to all of this, which is sad in some sense, but a relief as far as their emotions go. We've enjoyed our quiet Spring Break and will be relaxing together to round out the week.  I'll post again as we get underway with the chemo.   

F*%$ Cancer

What a long, long, LONG day!  Originally, Jim was scheduled for surgery on Monday, but had to reschedule due to his doctor's illness.  So, we made it in today at his Coeur d'Alene office.  We were so grateful to get in right away as Jim had another weird spot pop up quickly.  This one was on his middle finger.  It was painful and concerning, especially because of how quickly it grew.  After completely examining his hands, the doctor told us he suspected the new spot was cancer and wanted to operate on it along with the spot that came back positive on the last biopsy (in the webbing between his thumb and pointer finger.) There was a third spot, also in the webbing by his thumb.  The doctor hoped to get that one, but was concerned it was too near the first spot to address it.

So, with the plans to operate on the two spots and maybe the third, I kissed Jim goodbye and headed off to walk along the lakeshore.  It was a bummer to make a longer drive for this procedure, but Coeur d'Alene is truly a beautiful location.  (Ok, the mall may leave a little to be desired, but the natural scenery is amazing.)  As I was out, I thought the lake was the perfect backdrop to show off my latest accessory.  Thanks to some very thoughtful neighbors (thank you, Larson family!!!) I was ready to greet the day with strength while knowing the love of many was with us.  And, honestly, isn't it time that one of my hands makes the blog???

Kim's hand (FINALLY!!)  

As I was out, Jim was facing the hardest surgery thus far.  The doctor had to take two "scoops" from both locations and was not able to address the third spot.  And, of course, the spot on Jim's finger was indeed cancer and deeper than most.  Unfortunately, closing up the two locations did require grafts.  The donor skin was taken from Jim's right bicep.  They took a larger skin sample than the previous grafts as it needed to be used to close both surgical sites.  The following pictures are a touch graphic, so proceed with caution.

Jim's right bicep - donor site.  3/12/15

Jim's right hand post surgery and skin graft.  3/12/15

Once we returned home, we ended up walking to The Flying Goat for some "medicine."  Hopefully the recovery time will be tolerable.  Jim is headed in for a recheck next week.  Sometime after he has healed, we could be looking at chemo cream for his left hand or possibly surgery on his right to get the spot they couldn't today.  Thanks for the love and support.  We will make it.

Jim, post surgery #5. 3/12/15

Seriously???

Here we go again....  Last week, Jim called his dermatologist due to a few bumps on his hands, specifically a couple of concerning spots on his right hand.  The PA took two biopsies and froze multiple spots on both hands.  We were definitely hoping the biopsies would be negative, but deep down, we knew our luck with that was not the best.  Yesterday, Jim received the news that one biopsy was positive and the margins were not clear.  At this point, he is scheduled for his fifth Moh's surgery on March 9th.

The stats (as best we can recall):

15 biopsies 

11 positive for squamous cell carcinoma

4 surgeries on his left hand

1 full course of topical chemotherapy on his right hand

(We lost count on the profanities, fireball shots, and glasses of wine.)  

Jim and I are both ok.  We are so disappointed to be facing this yet again.  Jim was wondering how much of the past year he has spent "one handed."  Truly, I don't know.  BUT, there are no other options at this point.  Ignoring cancer is not something we are prepared or willing to do.  We know letting this go could make things much more difficult for Jim.  So, as we both are dreading the surgery and the recovery, we are very thankful for Jim's incredible medical team and the fact that there is a way to address his needs... even if we hate it!  Thank you to our friends and family who continue to walk this path with us.  As we grow so weary of the journey, it is an incredible blessing to have a very loud and strong support team.  

P.S. If you hang around our boys.... we haven't told them about the surgery yet, so hush!  We'll tell them when it is closer, but for now they are enjoying a "normal" life.  Well... as normal as it can be with the folks they have!